crap sleeping hours

i couldn't sleep last night.. only managed to push myself to sleep at 10 in the morning, and that was after having a wrestling session with a Tony (you know, those things you do when you were little kids..yeah i still do that haha) that i forced to wake up. guess it must have worn me out finally. heee!

then i woke up 6 hours later feeling like crap with a crap expression and a crap mood sort of like this (-_____-) somehow, the past few days have been like that. maybe it's because i'll be going back to brunei!! how exciting! =D oh the irony.

anyway, the thing that caused my first smile of the day was this:

mahahahahaaaaa. i love garfield. and jim davis.

detox

every end of the year i take a holiday, getting away from everything i've been facing throughout the year. i hit the brakes, and stop. it always allows me think clearer, i can tell what i want and dont need better. this year proves no different, but a whole lot harder to shed off that one thing i dont need and dont want, because it has grown a life of its own. oh no. but i will still alright. =)

sana's not coming back to brunei for a visit anytime soon, busy with med school interviews and such. jasmine cant find a good reason to persuade her parents to let her come back (haha). vee's back to school in taylors. fel and i are bumming around but starting our part time work soon.

i feel like we're always in the transition stage. is everything going to settle soon? sometimes i get this frustration, that i cant wait to grow up, get a real job, pay my own bills, buy my own furniture, basically things that i can be sure of and not knowing where exactly im heading and always feeling restless. garh.

oh crap. im pissing myself off arent i. haha!

A scrub is a guy that thinks he's fly
And is also known as a buster (busta, busta...)
Always talkin' about what he wants
And just sits on his broke ass
So (no)

I don't want your number (no)
I don't want to give you mine and (no)
I don't want to meet you nowhere (no)
I don't want none of your time and (no)

I don't want no scrub
A scrub is a guy that can't get no love from me
Hanging out the passenger side
Of his best friend's ride
Trying to holler at me

There's a scrub checkin' me
But his game is kinda weak
And i know that he cannot approach me
Cuz i'm lookin' like class and he's lookin' like trash
Can't get wit' no deadbeat ass
So (no)

I don't want your number (no)
I don't want to give you mine and (no)
I don't want to meet you nowhere (no)
I don't want none of your time (no)

If you don't have a car and you're walking
If you live at home wit' your momma
If you have a shorty that you don't show love
Wanna get with me with no money
Oh no i don't want no scrubs

=D

just when you thought it's after exams and fel and i would contribute...

fel's pc is KOed

i am not really in the mood right noww.

Well, ONE of us has to blog!!!!

So HERE'S what I said I'd do, and I thought I'd keep you uptodate!!!

1) Lose the 6 kilos before college so I can fit into all my pretty old kurtas that now make my back flab look like I'm trying to smuggle in cocaine packets under my bra.

WELL! It turns out that our weighing scale at home is 3 OR 4 KILOS HEAVIER than other ones! I checked it at the Doctor's office and I'm much lighter than I thought I was :) WHICH brings my weight loss target to just 3 kilos :) Until I'm a healthy weight. I ALSO bought pants in a size 8.

I'm a size 10 and I wear black pants everywhere.

They are my ONLY PAIR.

So wish me luck :D So far, been adjusting me eating habits n what not...I'm TRYING to put off exercise for as LONG as possible! :)

2) READ. Make good on the Borders Deal. (The Borders Deal with my rents is that after the HSC, as a late bday present, I can walk into the enormous, 2-storey Borders Bookstore and buy whatever I want, on them.)

:) I. Freaking. Love. Books.

Borders is like, Mecca, Jerusalem, heaven......all of it rolled into one. Seriously, people, I've bought SO many books over the last 3 weeks!!!!! *goes all squeeful inside* including:

- Russian classics by Dostoyevsky, Gogol and Tolstoy
- Contemporary award winners like Salman Rushdie and Lionel Shriver
- Cult classics like Jeffrey Eugenides (The Virgin Suicides) and Joseph Heller's Catch 22.
- Recommendeds like Ken Follet's The Pillars of the Earth.
- AND my usual selection of sob stories: the Dave Pelzer books :)
- OH AND GABRIEL GARCIA MARQUEZ. Heard TONS about him, can't wait to read those :)

3) Watch every movie I missed and wanted badly to catch: Borat, Knocked Up, Superbad, THE MATRIX AND LOTR TRILOGIES SO I AM A LOSER NO MORE....and basically everything else I can rent from VideoEzy.

Okay, maybe not yetttt......But I DID buy Scrubs Season 5 and Arrested Development (all 3 seasons). Seriously, people, WATCH ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT. It is THE smartest, snarkiest, most intelligent comedy out there.

4) Go to Sydney. Shop. Repeat.

:) Meehee! I DID! Before the Formal and bought really expensive shoes. What. I NEEDED to match my dress and they were GORGEOUS!!! I PROMISE I'll post photos up: I've got a couple of pics from the formal but I look like a whale, so I'll post up indiv. shots of my shoes and dress with ME NOT IN THEM.

Also went with 2 awesome friends, Izzy and Elyse, and we market hunted! Pity Paddy's was closed....oh well.

5) Start making miniatures again....god, I miss that stuff. Such an awesome hobby.

I haven't! I should!!!!

6) Watch Scrubs S5 and 6.

S5 DONE! S6 NOT ON DVD. DUMBASSIDIOTSLAH!

7) Oh, and on the LAST day of the HSC, I'm going to tell That Guy that I like him. It'll be fun, because hopefully by then, I'd have lost a couple of kilos ergo looking AWESOME in my Formal Dress (it's gorgeous, I shall pictorialize it for you as soon as my camera comes back to life) and so, when I see him again after that, I'll just look hot, as opposed to desperate and slightly chubby.

.................

How many of you knew I'd bail?

Sigh.

It makes me a little sad that EVEN THOUGH I'll never see him again, I couldn't find the courage to just come OUT with it......it's such crap, guys.

I wanted to.....but I didn't see him after the exam, just online, and then at the Formal, and I was too happy at the formal to risk screwing it up.

My pride would have hurt too much, I guess.


ANYWAY! NOW THAT LYN AND FEL ARE EXAMLESS, YOU HAVE NO EXCUSE. BLOG BEFORE I BITCHSLAP THE PAIR OF YOU!

The Day I Wore A Dress

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
:)

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
:)

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
:)

Amilyn says:
What's uupp

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
Formal = awesome.

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
:)

Amilyn says:
Wonderful

Amilyn says:
Now tell me why

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
WELL, many reasons!!!!!!!!!!

Amilyn says:
Hahaha i can see you're very excited

Amilyn says:
Post-excitation

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
1) Dress was a SUCCESS, I still thought I was fat....but it turns out, when your classmates only EVER see you in school uni and conservative Indian clothes, no one realizes you have a rather huge rack. Which apparently, I do.......?

Amilyn says:
Lol

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
2) Jarrod was there......and while he DIDN'T ask me to marry him, I have a PICTURE WITH HIM!!!!!! YESs! FINALLY!!!!! It MAY also be with Shaun, but that's OK :)
` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
3) I won an award :) Got the Citizenship Award medal and the second highest in class (in terms of academic awards), meehee.
` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
4) My favourite teacher was sitting at my table, and her son is REALLY cute :) Her other son's autistic and an awesome friend, and he ALSO won the Citizenship award (double recipients), but Casey (the older son) is REALLY REALLY cute.

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
:)

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
Meehee!

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
AND 5) My shoes, makeup and hair were awesome....seriously, my friend did my makeup really really well and it looked all natch n schmizz......and my HAIR WAS A CREATION!

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
It WAS! I got it done in a salon and my neighbour did it.

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
AND it looked so PRETTY and FEMININE.

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
And I'm slightly verbal overloading here, but love me nonetheless?

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
:)

Amilyn says:
Of course!

Amilyn says:
Hahaa

` "the thirteen year old in me is flabbergasted." izzah says:
:D I'm in the happiest mood :)


AND THAT, was my formal in one really breathless, shameless online conversation :D Photos as SOON as I get my friends to SEND them to me (my parents conveniently forgot.)