I LOVE THEM.

im just too much a sucker for sexy voices that can sing "how deep is your love".

one of them is gonna be the next american idol i tell you!!

Choice

It's all about making a choice.

1) I CHOOSE to wear my scraggly fro down today, because it makes me feel good about ME.

2) I CHOOSE to not let this 14-unit thing get the better of me, because the FAITH I ventured into it with was JUSTIFIED.

3) I CHOOSE to ignore the pain and not let this spoil my day, because I've taken enough Panadol to subdue a HORSE.

4) I CHOOSE to not let my weight issues become a problem, because I am SO MUCH STRONGER THAN THAT.

5) I CHOOSE to not mess this task up, because I AM AN ACHIEVER.

6) I CHOOSE to not let a stupid technicality get the better of me, because I will NOT let my circumstances control me.

7) I CHOOSE to become a doctor, so NOTHING IS GOING TO STOP ME.

8) I CHOOSE to give everything my all today, because if I can do it TODAY, I can do it TOMORROW, and the NEXT day, and the NEXT day.

9) I CHOOSE to not make excuses for myself, because excuses lead to COMPLACENCY which lead to INDULGENCE.

10) I CHOOSE to own this day because it might not come again.

11) I CHOOSE to do the right thing, because I am answerable to MYSELF.

It's ALL about making a choice.

psst,,.,.

HALO!!

:)

I dunno what to say bah.

:)

Bye.

:)

I Could Be.......

The other day, I talked to a friend of mine....we talked about me and exactly what makes me so horrible.

Yeah, no really.

We spent a good forty five minutes in deep, soul-searching conversation, in which we both talked about, quite simply, our flaws. And while I thought I'd scared her a bit (heck, I scared ME), I realized something. That our flaws are merely answers.

They are answers to questions that we can't answer with our OWN personalities. When you can't do something with the person you are, your flaws develop. It's ALL part of the survivalist instinct, the need and raw desire to be able to "deal" with anything. We deal with things by adapting our personalities, and a lot of the time, we don't like these adaptations. We call these flaws, because that's the only way we can excuse them.

But now I think it's high time we embraced these welcome additions to our personalities, instead of making excuses for them.

So, here we go. I can be MANIPULATIVE. I can be CUNNING. I can be PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE. I can MAKE YOU CRY. I can SAY THINGS THAT WILL PIERCE YOUR HEART. I can be SPITEFUL. I can get DEFENSIVE. I can be COLD. I can CREATE STRIFE.

But you know what?

If I didn't have the capacity to manipulate, people WOULD walk over me, I know it, again, because it is a DEVELOPED trait. People USED to walk over me, but then I started fighting for myself and getting what I want. The fact of the matter is, if you HAVE no manipulative ability in you, you can't and don't ever get what you want. I do, and I'm proud to say that when situation calls, I CAN get what I want and manage it on my own.

If I couldn't be cunning, I wouldn't be a planner. People wouldn't ask me what to do in situations, because I'd have no idea. Now, you know what? I do. And I'm proud.

Similarly with everything else!

Now, this doesn't mean I'm a heartless, cold, hideous person. I'm NOT manipulative or cunning or spiteful or angry by nature. But I CAN be. I wouldn't change a single thing about myself, and I'm not ashamed to admit that my character is filled with shades of colour, not all of them bright and pretty. Sometimes, it CAN scare me a little, but as long as I have my own heart beating in my body and not someone ELSE'S, I'm not worried.

Because remember, if you love me enough to be reading this, odds are, I carry a bit of your heart in mine, and THAT'S what makes it unique.

And now that I've screwed a good post with a mushy sentiment, I'm going to go nurse my camel mouth now. (My mouth still hurts. Dentists are evil, evil, evil people.)

there's no end to it!

so here i am again, to tell you all how lazy i am, and i don't think it's a good thing.

i KNOW i don't have much time in my hands and i have lots of school work, lots of unnecessary things i signed up to (heh) to prepare for, ECAs, lots of household chores to take care of, responsibilities yakiittyakyak.

yet, all i ever do is complain about it and never do anything about it. i think this is proving to be a severe and corroding disease spreading among the youngsters. they KNOW what they should be doing, and they DO worry about it but yet, they DON'T improvise any action plan and even if they do, they DON'T implement it. sounds stupid but true.Tony calls it NATO. No Action Talk Only. HAHAHA.

"i am so worried about my studies lah!"
"im so worried of exams you know?"
"im so scared i wont do well ahh!!"

well get the sorry ass up and do something about it! (ahem, im speaking to myself)

i should be up and doing something about my own issues as well. WELL I AM! was. was doing some research online, needed a break and decided that chocolatte needs and update.

it just occured to me that teachers always lie, albeit white lies, all the same, lies.

they say "it's just one more year, you work hard this year and you'll be done!"

LIES!!!

year after bloody year they say the same thing, yet students are still working their arse off every single year. WHEN WILL THIS END?

last saturday i spoke to my career counsellor/ lit teacher. she said i should work hardest for Alevels in this one important year because it's the turning point, it decides what uni i go to and what program i can do based on my results.

i say YEALAH what about when i enter UNI??

are you going to tell me for the next 5 years that those are THE important years which decides what job i get based on my graduating cert?

AND THEN WHAT WHEN I GET A JOB???

my boss will tell me "work hard this year, i see you have a chance for a promotion."

and then you get married, have kids who turn out to be demons, you and your husband tells yourself that things'll smooth over when the kids grow up. but when the kids grow up you worry about their future and blahblahblah the cycle continues, you're doing what your mom had been doing all along.

EVERY SINGLE YEAR UNTIL YOUR DEATH COMES THERE'S NO END TO IT!!!!!!!!!


.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.


then you sit down and think about it.

"it's life!"

you're going for the things you want, or you wouldn't have believed all those lies.

white lies people told you, just to shove you on.

=)